HODŻA NASREDDIN W WARSZAWIE

To był maj, pachniała Saska Kępa... A ja szedłem Nowym Światem, gdy na wysokości kawiarni u Bliklego usłyszałem TEN DŹWIĘK.
Dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum!

Jego źródłem była gitara w rękach pociesznego dziadka, który na rogu Chmielnej  z wielkim zapałem uderzał miarowo kciukiem w jedną strunę. Grając, szczerzył w uśmiechu swój jedyny ząb w górnej szczęce i emanował beztroską radością:
Dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum!

Zawsze lubiłem ulicznych szaleńców. Z czasów dzieciństwa pamiętam dobrze Jasia Żołnierza – dziadka z kozią bródką, który przemierzał centrum Warszawy w wojskowym rynsztunku i psioczył ile wlezie na komunę, wywołując uśmiechy przechodniów, z których wielu myślało to samo, ale nie miało ani czasu ani odwagi, by o tym opowiadać. Pamiętam babcię, która w stroju kierowniczki ruchu drogowego, dzierżąc w ręku milicyjny lizak, pilnowała porządku na Nowym Świecie. Oczywiście żaden kierowca nie reagował na jej komendy, ale kto tam wie, czyim ruchem ona kierowała? Ostatnio często widywałem Czarnego Piotrusia, który w nierozłącznym czarnym kapeluszu na głowie, stawiając wielkie susy pędził pasażem ulicy Foksal, mrucząc coś pod nosem. Chociaż pewnie go już nie spotkam, bo gdzieś mi się obiło o uszy, że powędrował już na tamten świat.
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Lubię miejskich szaleńców, bo są jak znaki zapytania. Oni są dla mnie jak krzywe zwierciadła rozbrajające wszystkich wokół siebie z powagi i ważności. Stawiają świat na opak. Król staje się żebrakiem a żebrak królem. Profesor to głupek a szaleniec wchodzi w rolę mędrca.

A kim teraz jestem ja?
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Chciałem wrzucić dziadkowi do kapelusza dwa złote, ale zorientowałem się, że przecież nie ma żadnego kapelusza ani czapki. Dziadek nie żebrał. Grał dla przyjemności. Prawdziwy wariat!
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Skręciłem w Chmielną.  Zatrzymałem się dopiero przy straganie z książkami. Antykwariusz powoli zwijał swój interes. Przeglądałem stare książki, nie szukając niczego konkretnego. Aż moje spojrzenie przyciągnął dobrze znany tytuł: Przygody niezrównanego Hodży Nasreddina. I wtedy doznałem olśnienia!
– Przecież ten dziadek… Ten dziadek przypomina… Zupełnie jak… przypomniała mi się anegdota… To było tak!

…Pewnego razu Hodża Nasreddin dostał w prezencie gitarę. Od razu z wielkim zapałem zabrał się do nauki gry. Ćwiczył przez cały dzień i noc, po czym oznajmił żonie:
– Wieczorem zaprosimy do nas gości a ja zagram dla nich gitarowy koncert!

Kiedy goście posilili się baklawą i herbatą, Hodża usiadł przed nimi na drewnianym stołeczku, wziął gitarę i zaczął grać. Wyprostowanym kciukiem uderzał w pustą strunę, wydając monotonny dźwięk:
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Goście słuchali z zainteresowaniem, czekając na rozwój wydarzeń. A Hodża grał:
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Goście zaczęli spoglądać po sobie z pewną konsternacją. A Hodża grał:
Dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum!

Po jakimś czasie jeden ze słuchaczy nie wytrzymał i zawołał:
– Hodża, ale przecież prawdziwi muzycy zmieniają akordy! Przebierają palcami po gryfie!
– BO ONI SZUKAJĄ, A JA JUŻ ZNALAZŁEM! – odpowiedział Hodża i z wielką pasją grał dalej:
Dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum dum!

***

Zawróciłem. Poczułem, że muszę wrócić do dziadka i w jakiś sposób złożyć mu hołd.
Hodża Nasreddin objawił się na ulicach Warszawy! – czułem falę wzbierającej euforii. I niemal biegnąc, skierowałem się w stronę Nowego Światu. A moje buty wybijały rytm:
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Radosny uśmiech zgasł na moich ustach. Dziadka już nie było! Pomyślałem, że musiałby byś szybki jak Czarny Piotruś, by tak nagle stąd zniknąć. Wydawało mi się, że w powietrzu ciągle unosi się dźwięk jego gitary:

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Rozczarowany ruszyłem z powrotem w stronę stacji metra. I nagle w oddali, gdzieś na wysokości kawiarni Karmello, zobaczyłem mężczyznę w turbanie i kolorowej szacie.
– Świat chyba zwariował! – zacząłem mówić sam do siebie. – Hodża Nasreddin w Warszawie! Hodża w Warszawie! Nasreddin w Warszawie! Naprawę Hodża!
Pobiegłem jego śladem.
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Ciąg dalszy opowieści na 14. Międzynarodowym Festiwalu Sztuki Opowiadania „Ściegi pamięci” . 30 listopada, godz. 17.00. Instytut Teatralny im. Z. Raszewskiego.

HODŻA NASREDDIN W WARSZAWIE

Fot. Aleksandra Gronowska
Rys. http://www.zamek-krolewski.pl/?page=3878
Plakat. Czarli Bajka

Ten wpis został opublikowany w kategorii Wydarzenia, Opowieści/do poczytania, Literatura i oznaczony tagami , , . Dodaj zakładkę do bezpośredniego odnośnika.

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